Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Not Cricket, it's Swear'icket now!

Some things about cricket should now be accepted as a norm, and sledging is one of them. No one should complain about being thrown a swear word at the highest level of the game. In fact a true cricketer should take it as a compliment if the opposition is targeting him with a volley of 'ungentlemanly' words, because that only means that the other team is so scared of his cricket that they are trying to score a win over him through psychological warfare. Look back in history and you will find that some of the best players of the game have been subjected to some of the most notorious sledging from the opposition.

It is true that Aussies are pioneers of on-field sledging and when other countries (read: Asian teams) give them anything back then that team is pulled up with ICC code of conduct charges. The art is not in swearing at another player, but the real art is in not getting caught. The wildest analogy I can draw here is the way players in football actually practice tripping over when the opposition has not even touched them in a tackle. Sledging is not just about words, its more about the body language and the sheer timing of the assault. Its about how you say it without getting caught or sounding offensive to the neutral ears. It cannot be a spur-of-the-moment outburst but a systematic cornering till the prey succumbs. There was a time when the think tank used to sit in the dressing room before the match and list down the technical weaknesses of players from the opposite team, prepare a game plan to get him out. That was a different kind of strategy. The new age thinking is to gather in the dressing room before the match and list down where it hurts (psychologically) the most to selected players of the opposition and prepare a sledge hammer plan around that. That's the new kind of strategy.

Soon cricket training will be deemed incomplete till the newbies have had a course on swearing. Soon an important trait to get selected in the national team would be how well you can swear and not get caught. Soon statistics will not merely read how many wickets you took or runs you have scored, but also how many opponents complained about you for abusing them.